Breakfast Chaos
by ArAnCaR No. 6
Summary: AU and OOC. Kakashi decides to let four year-old Sasuke try a hand at cooking today's breakfast. Disaster happens. Entry for xbleedinglotusx's Parental KakaSasu contest. Heavily based on Yotsubato chapter 64 by Azuma kiyohiko


**Entry for xbleedinglotusx's Parental KakashiSasuke contest :D**

**xXx**

**Plot: AU world and extremely OOC. Kakashi decides to let his four year-old Sasuke try a hand at cooking today's breakfast. Disaster happens. Heavily based on Yotsubato manga chapter 64, by Azuma Kiyohiko.**

**Note: Kakashi adopted Sasuke, so therefore, he's his father :D**

**xXx**

**Disclaimer: Naruto doesn't belong to me, neither does the hilarity and awesomeness that is Yotsubato**

**...**

***cries***

**xXx**

**Enjoy!**

**xXx**

"I'm hungry."

That was what started it off, a simple remark made by the little boy.

Kakashi merely stared groggily at the four year-old, who brought him from his sleep with an extremely violent smack to the face. Sasuke was lightly chewing on his lower lip, awaiting a response as he shuffled his still bare feet, his night clothes rumpled due to the nine-hour slumber he just came out of.

_'Just acts like he did nothing.'_ the silver-haired man thought to himself as he forced himself to sit up from the cozy bed, stretching as he did so, "Well, Sasuke, what would you like today?" A bright smile came upon the dark-haired child's face, and promptly shoved a children's book at his father's legs, for he wasn't tall enough to throw it at his face... yet. Kakashi took it from the small hands, turned it over, and glanced at the cover title, before looking down at the bubbly boy, and back to the cover once more.

"Little Lamb and Pancakes?" he asked incredulously, recieving an enthusiastic nod from his little boy. Silence overcame them for a while, before Kakashi spoke again, "So you want the lamb, or the-?" Upon hearing the name of the cute little barn animal, Sasuke visably grimaced, clashing with his adorable face. "Daddy, you oaf!" he exclaimed, looking utterly upset, whilst Kakashi simply stared. _'Oaf?'_ he thought quizzically to himself as the child continued, "not the lamb, you don't eat cute animals! This this!" The four year-old tapped repeatedly at the cartooned doodle of a well-known breakfast, making Kakashi feel like an actual idiot for even thinking it was something else. "Oh, I see, you want pancakes, right?" Sasuke nodded in response, "I want to make them too!" Giving a slight nod of approval, Kakashi rose, handing the child his reading book back, "They look easy enough." was all he said as both walked out of the room and downstairs into the kitchen.

**xXx**

"Okay," Kakashi withdrew a yellow box of pancake mix out of the cupboard, placing it on the table with the rest of its future companions as Sasuke watched curiously, "I believe that is all, now Sasuke, break these eggs in this bowl." the silver-haired male lifted the boy atop a stool, giving the child a proper view of all the ingredients to be used. He quickly fished a bowl from the rack, tapping one finger on it for emphasis as he brought around another colorful filled with white, oval shaped eggs from the fridge. "Take three of these, okay? Can you do that?" The four year-old nodded furiously, "Yup, got it." he echoed, taking one of the eggs in his petit hands. The older male nodded lightly, turning from his son and on his way to get the skillet needed, when he heard a rather odd and single _crack_. Quickly, he turned, and was honestly shocked to see Sasuke, with a second egg in his hand. The little boy lifted an arm up, the same with the egg, before sharply throwing it into the bowl, causing bits and pieces of shells and dollops of whites to splatter on the table due to the force. Kakashi quickly stopped him.

"Sasuke! Not like that! I meant to crack the egg first, don't throw it in!" The child blinked, the third egg in hand and above his head, "What's the difference?" he curiously asked, on the verge of throwing the other one in too. "Son, you don't eat the shells."

...

"Oh....."

**xXx**

"Now, open this plastic bag, here's some scissors." Kakashi handed Sasuke the pancake mix and a pair of safety scissors as he wiped the last of the sticky egg whites from the table. "Okay." the boy sing-songed, holding the bag up and carefully snipping away at the binding plastic. His father watched for a few seconds, and after deeming the boy to be perfectly fine with doing so, turned to the sink to wring out the stickiness from the sponge that was used. Just as he turned the water faucet, a dull thump was heard, causing the twenty-seven year-old to stiffen.

Despite his own desire not to, he slowly turned around.

Sasuke was gawking at the leftover piece of plastic which was grasped in his small fingers, his mouth open for emphasis, scissors mid-air. The same expression came upon the silver-haired man's face as his eyes took in the damage. A fine layer of flour was dusted over everything within a one foot radius, the boys clothes, his feet, the table! And it all fell in a messy heap on the tiled floor, the plastic bag still intact through the white mess. Sasuke scowled, before jumping down from the stool and sweeping the dry mix back into the bag with his hand.

"That's not right! What the heck!"

Kakashi sweatdropped.

**xXx**

"Last thing," Kakashi finally said, holding a measuring cup and a carton in front of his son, "milk, you think you can do it this time?" he asked, desperately hoping for no messes. "Of course!" Sasuke opened the milk carton and dragged the measuring cup over so it sat in front of him. With a wobbly hold, the child began to cautiously pour the milk into the container, spilling some as he did. Quickly picking this up, the four year-old lessened the flow of milk, successfully filling it up to the required line. "Done! Look Daddy, no massive mess!" he happily called out, setting the carton with a dull sound on the table.

"Good job, Sasuke." Kakashi congratulated him as he lifted the measuring cup from the table, cleaning off the minimal spill. "Now what?" Sasuke asked, peering down at the milk in the container. "We mix everything up." the twenty-seven year-old parent explained, turning to retrieve the utensil needed as his four year-old made a guessing game of it. "With what? A spoon?" the dark-haired child asked. "Not quite, son, guess again," Kakashi said, making sure to hide the item behind his back as Sasuke furiously scoured his mind for an answer. Kakashi decided to give him a hint, "it's made of metal, and it looks like a lot of loops meshed together." Sasuke's face brightened, "it's a tornado!" Kakashi made a face and shook his head, "It's made from metal." he repeated, as Sasuke put on his 'thinking' face again. "It's a cyclone!" The silver-haired male gave him a look of _'are you kidding me'_, "Those are weather patterns!" he argued, hoping the four year-old would get the picture soon enough.

"So it's not a tornado?"

Kakashi mentally face-planted as he bought the hidden utensil from behind. "No, son. It's a whisk, a whisk." Sasuke frowned in response. "No fair! I wasn't finished guessing!"

**xXx**

...

...

...

"Do you want me to do it?" The silver-haired parent asked, seeing that Sasuke seemed to have some trouble mixing all the ingredients together with the whisk.

"I'll do it! Just stay quiet!"

**xXx**

"Daddy, I finished!" Sasuke called out, ceasing his stirring of the now completed batter. The twenty seven-year old lifted the whisk from the liquid mixture, "Let's turn on the stove, here, I'll cook one to show you how it's done." Kakashi turned the small knob at the stove a mere foot from them, waiting for the small flames to start from the repeated clicking of the contraption. Once they did, he slid the skillet back to rest upon the heat, waiting for it to warm up a bit. After a few minutes, Kakashi retrieved the prepared batter from the table, as Sasuke dragged over a small step-stool for a better view.

"Look here," the silver-haired parent poured some of the batter onto the heated skillet, the yellowish mix quickly spreading to nearly fill the entire pan, "Pour it into the skillet like this, and wait for a little bit, you're going to let it cook for a bit." Within a minute or two, the stilled circle began to bubble, making Sasuke gawk, "It got all bubbly!" he exclaimed as Kakashi procceeded to explain, "Right, when it gets all bubbly, that's when you flip it." Taking a flat, wide spatula, he let it slide underneath the half-cooked pancake, and begab to count to three. "One... two... three." At the second odd number, Kakashi quickly turned the pancake, so the golden-brown side faced up, "That turned out nice." he commented, as Sasuke stared in astonishment as the other side cooked, "Woah!" he exclaimed as his father finally slid the finished pancake out from the skillet and onto a plate.

"Now, it's finished, I think you aught to be able to do that, right?"

"It looks just like my book! I want to do one too!"

**xXx**

The four year-old used a large, deep metal spoon to scoop up some of the batter, a determined look on his little face as he quickly rushed it over towards the sizzling skillet, his father supervising from behind. Sasuke dropped a few dollops of the mix, and quickly spilled it on the skillet, forming an extremely weird shape when he did. The dark-haired boy stared at the odd shape of Lord knows what, "It's not making a circle." he deadpanned, as his father sweatdropped at his reaction. "Try putting a little more in." he advised, and Sasuke obeyed, silently adding more. The shape was simply bigger. "It still didn't make a circle." he deadpanned again, as bubbles began to form at the surface again, catching his attention, "It started to bubble!" he cried out, pointing at it. "Alright, give it a shot. It's harder than it looks, so good luck."

It was then that Sasuke did what can easily be the weirdest thing in pancake history (if there is such a thing).

He stuck the spatula into the half-cooked batter, and just began to scrape at it.

Kakashi gaped at his son as he continued to poke and prod at it.

"From underneath! Flip it from underneath!" Kakashi urgently and rather frantically yelled, causing Sasuke to stare at him in response. Nevertheless, he obeyed, and dug the spatula underneath the oddly shaped pancake. But, one must remember, this is a four year-old that's cooking, there will be mistakes, and Sasuke is not an exception. As he tried to turn the half-cooked pancake, he did not flip it, or do anything to it for that matter, rolling it into itself by mistake. After he did so, both father and son stared at the cooked creation.

"It looks more like an omelete." Kakashi finally stated, as Sasuke continued to stare at his dish, a look of determination claiming his face, "Fail!" he finally declared, turning to look at his father with the straightest face he's ever seen, "I'm gonna make another one!" Kakashi merely nodded, having already forseen that, "We've got enough for one more, so go ahead."

The boy retrieved the bowl which held the yellowed and now stiffened batter, stirring it and mumbling things that sounded like 'wrong', 'pancakes', and 'why', when sounds from the front door echoed through the house, as well as a familiar voice to the older of the two.

"Excuse the visit!" A tall blond man walked in, a wide grin on his face as a younger version of himself trotted up, frowning at the cooking dark-haired child as he did. "What are you doing?" five year-old Naruto asked, trying to get a peek. Sasuke glared in response, "Pancakes!" he suddenly yelled, startling the two nearby adults at his abrupt outburst, "you'd know that if you just looked!!!" The younger blond stared at the other's primary attempt just a few inches away on the table, before he suddenly burst out laughing, "This is a pancake?! Hahahaha!!! Sasuke made this?! No, I can't tell by looking!!!" Minato Namikaze stared down at his kid, displeased at his rudeness as Kakashi did at his own, watching as Sasuke's small mouth turned sharply down into a scowl, an angry vein popping out of his head as his eyebrows knitted together in fury, "That was a test run!" he defended, "this time, I'll make it right!"

That was perhaps the most amusing part of Sasuke, his uncanny dislike for Naruto, which usually ended up with some oddly hilarious remark or something of the sorts.

The four year-old dumped another large spoonful of batter into the hot skillet, his eyes clear with concentration, almost as if he was trying to make it into a circle with some sort of mind power. Naruto decided to kill the moment by remarking that the pancake was a funny shape, earning a nudge from his father for another rude comment. Sasuke ignored him, and merely waited for it to began showing its little trademark bubbling. "It's bubbling," he murmured to himself, holding the spatula up. Sasuke once again shoved a bit at the cooking pancake with the utensil, but failed to properly turn it once more. Naruto laughed again in response, "Hahaha! Wow, you suck!"

And that's what triggered it.

Sasuke gave his rolled creation a hard stare, and Kakashi was honestly alarmed when he saw tears building up to brim the boy's onyx black eyes. Within a few seconds, the four year-old burst out crying, making Naruto freak a little and begin sputtering, "No, wait, I didn't-" before he could finish his sentence, however, Sasuke threw the spatula at him and stepped down, still sobbing, from the wooden step-stool. Almost immediately, he dropped to his knees and into a fetal position on the floor, his cries still quite loud. Naruto stared, guilty, as Minato gave Kakashi an apoligetic glance. "He's just pouting." the twenty-seven year-old said, as his son continued crying on the floor. The blond five year-old gaped a little, "This is pouting?" he asked, skeptical.

Kakashi, did not answer, but, for the sake of making his little boy happy again (because a depressed Sasuke made everyone sad), he retrieved some more mix, and prepared another two bowls of batter within a few minutes. "Come on Sasuke," he called out to the child who was now flatly lying on the floor, face down to the wooden grounds, "Let's try again." Sasuke stared back up, "but who's going to eat them all?" he asked, curious. A few seconds afterwards, Kakashi stood abruptly tall, "I will," he boldly declared, "for Daddy is actually, a pancake-loving man."

Everyone stared.

"A new foe!" Sasuke suddenly exclaimed, looking alarmed whilst the other two gave him looks that clearly said, 'what?', "Alright! I'll try again!"

**xXx**

Sasuke got back up on the stool, the bowl and spoon in hand as his father gave him some advise this time.

"You don't have to swirl it around," Kakashi said, the four year-old listening obediently, "Just try droppng it straight into the middle of the pan." Sasuke did so, and as expected, the mixture made a round shape, nearly filling the entire pan. The child gaped as if it was the most life-changing object on Earth, "It made a circle," he deadpanned, shocked before smiling up at his parent, "it made a circle!" Within a few minutes, the surface once again became bubbly, and Kakashi pitched in another helpful hint, "Shove it in from below, firmly now." The dark-haired boy did so, both hands clasped to hold the pancake steadily in mid-air. "Okay," his father added, "now, flip it over."

"Ok, ready-" Sasuke trailed off, getting ready to land the pancake on the other side. It was then that for some reason, he shut his eyes tightly, and began to oddly lean towards the left. Minato and Naruto stared at Kakashi for an answer, who simply sighed, "You're just tilting your body, just go for it!" The four year-old reopened his eyes, "Okay," he breathed, sucking in some air, "One... two... and..."

...

It happened so suddenly.

One second, Sasuke had the pancake balanced in the wide, flat utensil, the other... he let out a ninja-like yell, and in his gusto, he actually _threw_ the half-cooked pancake into the stove, splattering it everywhere.

Three simutaneous 'EH?!'s echoed

"Why did you slap it down like that?!" Kakashi exclaimed, horrified at the sticky mess covering the stovetop. Sasuke, on the otherhand, frowned, and wiped nonexisting sweat off his brow, "My aim was a bit off." he murmured, as Naruto gaped in response. "That's because that's not how pancakes work."

**xXx**

Sasuke once again poured another spoonful of the thick mixture into the skillet, allowing it to slink down from the spoon and into another round figure. "I'll get it this time." he mumbled to himself, watching as the bubbles once again floated to the surface. Following his father's advice, he dug the spatula firmly underneath the cooked half, holding it up a foot and a half above the pan, countinf to three before he once again tried to flip it.

***SPLAT***

"Oh, so close!" Sasuke exclaimed, looking a little dissapointed.

"Why are you slamming them down?!" Naruto finally yelled out, confused and disbelieving.

"Looks like you lifted a little too early," Kakashi said, looking down at the little boy, "if you wait a little longer, it'll be firmer and easier to flip," then, as a second thought, added, "and be gentler, too." Sasuke did as he was told, but the results didn't look too impressive. "The bottom's all black," he quietly said, staring at the pitch darkness of the over-cooked pancake. "You left it for too long," his father explained, as Minato too pitched in a tip, "And you flipped it a bit too slowly." Sasuke tried again multiple times, some ending up like omeletes, others lightly golden and splattered, and others burnt black and somewhat charred. "I'll make this next one a success!" the four year-old declared, glaring down at the skillet once more.

"Because I'm getting tired of this."

For what seemed like the umpteeth time, Sasuke poured the last scraps of batter in the very middle of the pan, once again waiting for the bubbles that seemed to mock him. Finally, when the cursed things popped and reappeared in the surface of the uncooked side, the boy dug the spatula underneath, neatly lifting the pancake up. Except, this time, he did not violently throw it at the stove, instead, he carefully tilted it, cautiously letting the pancake slide, until it landed with a dull plop.

Right back on the skillet.

Sasuke gaped at the golden brown side in shock, as a loud and impressed 'WOAH!' echoed from the five year-old nearby. The four year-old turned to stare at his father, his mouth open as if saying, 'look!'. Kakashi and Minato began to simutaneously clap for his success. Sasuke smiled in return.

**xXx**

"They look awful," Kakashi admitted, in the middle of consuming one of his son's earlier pancake disasters, "but they're pretty tasty." Minato lightly frowned at him, "Don't say mean stuff like that," he mildly scolded as he broke off a piece of one of the faintly charred ones, "he'll pout again." Sasuke broke into a fit of giggles as he pointed to the omelete-looking one Naruto was eating, "Yeah, these sure look awful!"

"You don't mind?" Minato sweatdropped, "you made them, you know."

"Come on, Naruto," Kakashi reasoned, "eat up." The blond boy glared lightly, "I am eating!" he exclaimed, "I'm stuffing myself full! Didn't you say you were going to eat them all up?!" the silver-haired man shrugged, "I think I ate too much." he merely replied. Naruto scowled in response, "What do I care?!" he nearly yelled, before suddenly yelping at a punch to the head he recieved from his father. "Don't be rude!" he berated.

Sasuke laughed and choked on the pancake in response, "Milk!" he coughed out, grabbing his nearby glassful and drinking as Naruto crackled in retaliation. The dark-haired boy glared in response and threw the cupful of milk at the five year-old. "Gah!" came the startled yell from the blond boy, as Sasuke pointed and laughed at him in childish evil.

"Hahahahaha!!!"

_'Kids.'_ Minato and Kakashi thought simutaneously as they both pretended nothing happened.

**xXx**

**A/N: Heavily based on Yotsubato chapter 64 :D Everyone like?**

**Entry for xbleedinglotusx's Parental KakaSasu contest, but even then, I hope everyone liked!**

**Review! Before a flying pancake comes your way!!!! XD *crackle***


End file.
